Perfection

Here I am, broadcasting from Day 23 of the Whole 30 Program, and I'd like to say that everything is going perfect... but I'm not going to lie to you like that.  Plus, you already know that coffee creamer is my non-negotiable, so there's that.

I will be honest and tell you that I went out on Saturday night... A brewery-bus-pub-crawl, and yes, I participated.  Going into it, I thought maybe I could just drink a glass of wine at each place, and it really wouldn't be so bad... right?

But here's the other thing.  I pretty much broke every rule possible, but I also didn't care.  Why?  Because I had the best damn time.  I struggled with it on Sunday (mostly because I was reeeeeeaallly hungover) but got right back on track and didn't feel the need to eat myself into a coma like I've done in the past when I slip on a diet.

Was it a perfect weekend?  Not at all, but I learned more from that experience than I did the first 20 days.

I think this is how I get into so much trouble with eating in the first place.  I'm not perfect.  I love food.  I love sweets.  And I love wine...or beer... or a margarita.  What I have never learned is the ability to balance my eating.  It's all or nothing usually.  Black or white.  Healthy or unhealthy.  Good or bad.

What I want is to live in a world where I can have those things, on occasion, and still maintain most of my current eating habits.  I have one week left, and from there I am going to figure it out.  I have gained so much from this and I don't want to ever go back to the way I was eating and living.  I was miserable with myself, and that isn't good for anyone.  But I also know that my world doesn't exist without homemade chocolate chip cookies.

Balance.  Healthy with the occasional side of sweets.  Or wine :)

I've also learned that there really aren't "good" or "bad" choices.  They're all just choices, and my job is to figure out which ones are best for me.  One size plan doesn't fit all, and I have to create one that's unique for me and learn to live with adding healthy choices more often.

Logical, right?  Yeah, it's because I haven't had sugar for 23 days.  Sugar and logic aren't buddies.

So there... If you're chasing perfection or judging yourself against perfection, STOP.  You won't win.  Perfection will kick real life's ass every time and leaving you feeling not enough.

You are enough, even with peanut M & M's.

We always were...

Happy Thursday Peeps!  Make it a good one :)