Day 5

I saw this article on Facebook today and had to admit that it made me stop and think.  I will be the first to admit that after eighteen years of marriage the lines of love can be blurry.  Somedays they're clear, and sometimes the lines are faded.  You know they're there, but it's hard to see them.

Now while I'll be the first to fight for making sure we carve out time for ourselves and creating a life we love, I will agree that a marriage can only survive if we are in it for the other person.  Marriages fall apart when one or both are being selfish and only thinking of themselves, creating a pile of resentment.

This can be said for all relationships really.

Kids
Friendships
Co-Workers
Even Pets

I think when we stop looking for what we're getting out of a relationship, and focus instead on how to make the other person happier, we're really making a connection.  We're making a difference in their lives at that point, and hopefully, they're returning the favor.

Day 5:  Today I am thankful for Toby and all that he does for me.  He makes me laugh more than anyone else on the planet, and never goes a day without letting me know how he feels.  No, it's not always love and roses, but most days it's exactly what we need.

Hope you all had a wonderful weekend!

Motherhood

As I sit here tonight it is killing me not to be able to see Sarah and precious little Jonah (Little J-Twizzle, for long).  And knowing I was one of the first to even know about him nine months ago, this doesn't seem fair.

I comforted with the morning sickness.
I sat through nine months of bagel eating.
I hugged and calmed her down when she needed, right down to the day before.
I tried to be brutally honest with what really happens in delivery so she was prepared.
I told her to get an epidural, even though she was one of those who thinks they're tough enough.

And I've texted.  Oh how I've texted... words of wisdom, dirty jokes, sarcasm, truth, and joy.

To say I make it a priority to help her through life is an understatement, and I don't know what it is that compels me to take on this role, but we are connected in a weird way that cannot be explained.

And if I can't be there this week, there are a few things I want her to know... mom to mom.

• First of all, you are going to be overwhelmed.  It may not hit today or tomorrow, but it will hit, and when it does you'll wonder why you ever thought being a mother would be cool.

• You will fall so head over heels in love with this baby, and will find yourself just standing over them to watch them sleep.

• Your whole being is going to be taken over by this small, beautiful boy (a boy!!), but you will soon find out that your heart grows even bigger each day.  You will have space for Jonah, as well as well as the life you had before him.  Yes, your priorities will change, but it doesn't mean you have to choose one or the other.  You will learn the fine art of juggling and relying on your friends... and that's okay.

• Post-pardum is real.  Take it seriously if you're sad.

• Ask for and accept help as much as possible, especially at the beginning.  You may feel like super-mom (and you are), but none of us got through the first week alone.  

• Take naps when he naps.  Even if it's 4 6 times a day.

• No one cares if your house is a mess.

• Be kind to your self.

• Your friends have always been your life line.  That will not change.

• Above all things, remember this:  Jonah might be one of the luckiest little boys I know because he has you as his mom.  I hope he gets your sense of humor and especially your snarkiness of late.   I hope he follows in your path to be utterly passionate about something when he gets older.  I hope he knows he has not just you and Joel, but the entire skating family and the place we call home.  You're going to spend hours upon hours worrying about the tiniest issues, but I assure you, everything will be okay in the end.

This should get you through to Friday, when come hell or high water, I'm coming to see Mr. T.... with presents and dinner.  I plan on holding him for a long time too, so get your fix before I get there.  

Until then, you can text me any time day or night.  

I can't wait to see how this next part of your life unfolds.  

Instagram

No, I am not a 12 year-old girl.

But I do love Instagram.

I have found it to be more fun that Facebook at times, because it forces you to 'see' the world, your world, differently.  Things you wouldn't think were interesting can look completely different with a change of filter or color, and presto-chango, you're a photographer!

I do realize that I take all together way too many pictures of Goldie, but seriously, her face is too cute, and my life isn't the most exciting on most days.  I'm working on it.  Recently, I have been trying to take at least one picture a day... kinda makes for a really interesting photo journal of sorts.

So do me a favor and join Instagram and follow me.  I'll do the same.

And together we can learn to appreciate the little things in our lives.

bachelor

I'm not sure why I watch it.

Correction, I know why I watch it, but every time I vow I'll never watch again.  Then Jess and Debbie start talking about it and I just get sucked in.  Every.  Single.  Time.

Plus, there's the whole positive spin on how much better I feel about my self and life after watching this show.  These girls are absolutely loco, and somehow the bachelors never see it.

This season is especially promising with Sean Lowe, blonde haired, blue-eyed, all american boy.  He wants a wife and a family... blah, blah, blah.  And he has twenty-five bachelorettes all dying for him.

Let the awkwardness begin...

Will you be watching?

Sisters

Today's post is about sisters.

Good sisters.
Bad sisters.
Sisters-in-law.
Sisters of another mother.

I cannot imagine what my life would be like without my sister, and it breaks my heart to know some have this  cross to carry.  My sister has literally picked up the torch that my mom carried for so long.  Instead of Grammy Days, we have Cathy Days.  She loans me money.  She worries about me and the boys.  And she tries to fix absolutely everything in my life.

On those days when I'm feeling lower than usual, she'll call.  I swear she has a radar.  In short, she's my angel here on earth.

Does she still drive me crazy sometimes?  Of course.
Will I get mad over stupid things?  Duh..
Will she always be my sister.  Absolutely.

So, today, if you get a chance, be grateful for the sisters in your life, wherever they may be <3

Apple

As Apple prepares to release the newest iPhone 5 (finally), I have been thinking about Steve Jobs this morning.  I haven't read his book yet, but I am intrigued enough to pick it up at some point.  It seems as though he truly had it all figured out, this thing called life.  And in his death, he continues to teach us.

I am going to print this quote out and paste it to my bathroom mirror.

It really says it all.  I know we all have to make money, but with the extra time in our day (yes, most of us have some) are we really doing what we love?  Do we even know what that is?

Right now, I feel like procrastination is my one great love.  I am an expert at it :)  I accomplish procrastination every single day.  Sometimes it's in the morning, sometimes in the afternoon, but most times it's in the evening when I literally zone out in front of the tv.  Seriously, I'm a first class procrastinator.

With a capital P!

So, with that I'll leave you to figure out what you would do with the last day of your life.

Will it be just like yesterday, or will it be something different?

Have a fabulous day :)

Week 8

So, this is it.  The last week of figuring out what's most important to you.  The one thing I have learned along the way is that there really is no shortcut.  No magic pill or potion that will make you happy and all your dreams come true.  Hell, if there were we would've stopped reading this a long time ago.  Happiness and 'The Good Life', if you haven't figured out, are already in your reach.  It's like Glinda said to Dorthy, "It was inside you the whole time."

Week 8 is about that magical word, Love.  And I don't mean the marriage love, or I love those shoes... it's about loving yourself, your life, and your choices.

There isn't anything in our lives that can't be fixed by loving it.  We're just so used to complaining about things (work, weight, money, kids), that we never thought to try and accept it into our lives.

When you're feeling like it can't get any worse, find something, anything, to love.  All of us can have bad days.  What do we focus on when that happens?  Well, we can only obsess about how everything is wrong.  This happens on facebook all the time.  You'll see someone ranting about how horrible things are over an over again.  It's as if their brains are only wired to see the bad in everything around them, and then make it their status.

We get it... your life sucks.

But it doesn't have to be that way.

Starting today, be a light that only shines on the good stuff.  For instance, it is Monday morning on the first day of summer and Summer is usually not my thing.  But this year I am bound and determined to make it better.  Life is way to short to dislike a season, right?  I mean, that's a lotta time.  So already this morning, I have started a list in my head of the things I do love about this time of year:

• Reading on the deck
• Not being at work at 8 am.
• Writing in my pj's at 7 am.
• Weekends off (well, most of them)
• Kids helping around the house.
• Days at the beach.
• Walks outside.

No, it's not long, but it is a start, and at least it proves I don't hate everything about Summer.  Look around you today and figure out where your love is going.  Is it wasted on things that don't matter to you, or are you using it wisely?

Do what you love and love what you do.  I think it really is that simple.  

Have a lovely week my friends!